Been getting your love relationship advice from a magazine? Well, there's your problem right there. Hollywood movies and your favorite magazines may offer plenty of tips on finding dates and what to do with them later that night, but they rarely give you anything you can use to build a strong, long-term relationship. For a change, here are some tips you can actually use.
Build trust!
A lot of expert relationship advice focuses on trust because it truly is the foundation of a loving relationship. While trust sometimes develops by its self, putting a little work into building it never hurts. How can you build trust? First of all, be reliable. Call when you say you will and show up when you promise to. Also try not to make little off-hand promises you have no intention of keeping, like "Yeah, I'll help you clean the car soon."
When you have an argument, be fair and don't take jabs at your partner's weak spots. Respect your partner's feelings and avoid telling them they "shouldn't" be feeling a certain way just because that's not how you'd feel in the same situation.
Don't ignore money matters!
This may not be very common relationship advice, but it is very important. If you share any financial responsibilities, you owe it to each other to communicate on this issue. Sure, it's not much fun to talk about money, but it's even less fun when you're in serious trouble due to poor planning. Don't let it get that far. In fact making goals and rewarding yourselves when you reach them can be a really fun way to achieve your financial dreams and build your relationship at the same time.
Even in a relationship with only one bread winner, both of you should be involved in financial planning. To keep problems at bay, put aside time once a month (while you're doing the bills is a good time) to discuss and plan your financial situation. Once you get used to it, it'll become a lot less stressful.
End arguments fast!
It's bound to happen: your partner does that really, really annoying thing yet again and instantly you're yelling at each other. The important thing isn't so much stopping it from happening as knowing how to stop it fast when it does happen. In fact, the ability to diffuse post-argument tension can make or break a relationship. How's that for valuable love relationship advice?
So, when you realize your gripe session is getting out of hand, try to say something kind to your partner, try a bit of humor, or acknowledge that the two of you ultimately share the same goals and maybe need to take a breather to clear your heads.
Talk about what matters!
Ever hear people say they and their spouse lead separate lives and wonder how a marriage ends up that way? Most often is starts with a lack of deep communication. Real relationship-sustaining communication does not mean talking about when the cats due for its shots or when you're going to get that leak fixed. It means talking about your feelings from day to day, your hopes for the future, and even your fears.
By Tracey Todd
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