Don't be surprised if you find yourself in a long distance relationship. Long distance relationships undoubtedly insert additional strain and present their own unique challenges in marriage. Or, at the very least, they make the current challenges all the more demanding to overcome. Most marriages form a schedule, and unexpectedly being shoved into a relationship that is fundamentally dissimilar can cause some major backlash.
Wrecking The Standard
Household dynamics are entirely disrupted with the onset of a new long distance relationship. While one partner must endure traveling or living abroad, usually for work-related reasons, the other partner is left "holding the bag" with all the household chores. This is definitely true if children are an issue. Even the loving family pet becomes an extra burden when only one partner is at home to care for it.
Depending on the maturity level of your kids, you will likely see a variation in their actions when one spouse is forced to spend time missing from home. Even though they may perhaps not give the impression like they are affected, be aware that your kid's worlds have also been shattered by the family disturbance. This can only intensify the anxiety level the non-traveling spouse is experiencing. It's essential to try to have patience with your kids and recognize that they are not as grown-up in comprehending how to contend with the new situation.
Steps That Should Help
The one who is not at home should revel in gratitude and at least communicate an understanding of the additional load that is now left on the stay-at-home spouse. Simple "Thank Yous" make a big impact in demonstrating understanding for a challenging situation. Showing a willingness to help out directing the kids, while you are away, is not only a great boost, but also expresses readiness to do your part even if not around physically.
Also, be ready to accept additional responsibilities if you come home. Or, at the very least, make sure you talk about your husband or wife's challenges when you finally return back home. Traveling is tiring as well, so clear discussion on expectations is essential for those precious weekend days.
Beware of Resentment
The 'at home' partner needs to guard against anger, and stay honest about his/her viewpoint, but without nagging. If you don't feel your spouse is supporting you for the added duties you have taken on, you ought to be intelligent in how you express it. Constantly expressing how challenging the situation is for you will possibly only push away your partner.
Learning to work together throughout challenges is a skill most married couples find challenging. Taking the time to understand each others wishes not only assists throughout a long distance relationship, but also assists once the two of you are re-connected. If you are having difficulties resolving conflict and creating intimacy with your spouse, be certain to look into the FREE marriage strategies we have created from our program: MarriageMap - 90 Days To A Spectacular Marriage.
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